Hypopocrite...

This is the final result of the kolam my classmates and I painstakingly did for 3 days. We're so proud of it. I am proud of it. But I can't help but feel sad about it as well. Because this kolam is made out of approximately 100 kg of rice!

I mean, 100 kg!! How many poor people can we feed with that? How many natural disaster victims can we help? This few months have been hard on countries like Indonesia and such because of typhoons, earthquakes etc and here we are in Malaysia, complaining about rain and the sun and wasting 100 kg of rice for art!

The things people do for art.

I feel like a hypocrite when I look at it sometimes. Like, we often say, "Don't waste food!" and voila! I'm wasting it right now!

But despite my bitterness towards this, I am very proud of my work. We finished it yesterday evening and already some naughty hands (and idiotic lady) disturbed it! I hate those people! There's a reason why the Tun Jugah management place those lines around it!

Oh well, another bitterness aside, I would like to wish all those who celebrate Deepavali,

Happy Diwali!

Crush You Crush Me!

When I think back at the time when I had crushes on certain boys, it felt so surreal to me. Like, I remember being so dreamy about that one guy that I fantasize about him all the time. Gosh, it feels so creepy to me when I think back but well, girls will be girls. And that feeling called love - more of monkey love - can turn the most logical mind into...something not logical anymore.

It's been a while since I had a crush on someone, the last time was last year. Had a thing for this Korean dude. Wish I can have a special someone now because most of those around me now already have theirs. (Yes, I can faintly hear Christine in the background saying what she always say...haha...)

But nah, I'm being realistic. Having a relationship now will crush me. Because I have a very bad time management and all. Haha. Oh well. I'm only 19...no rush...(again, I can hear Christine in the background..)

XXX Holic...

*teh gay-ness!!!*

I think it's my first time blogging about one of my other passion, which is Anime/Manga. So yeah....anyway...

Chapter 136 of XXXHolic just came out and oh Watanuki looks so gay!!! Look at the pose! Gosh CLAMP....why must you make him look so gay??? And the whole chapter screams YAOI (japanese for gay) with Doumeki buying groceries for Watanuki then staying over for dinner....*shudders*...

Well, it's CLAMP we're talking about anyway....they're famous for making yaoi parings....

Not having a man staying with me is kinda hard because there are some things that I am accustomed to have my dad do like plumbing, changing the light bulbs, car stuff etc...

So now I have to get used to all this "vacancies" and try to do it because I know my mum don't know this kinda stuff. Like today, the car tyre went flat when my mum was sending me to college. Of course, I can change it - because I always observe my dad do it when I was young - but I wasn't sure of some stuff.

Like, I'm not sure where should I put the jack thingie because the last time I watched and helped my dad changed tyres was on the Pajero. So my mum and I had to wait for my cousin to come and help us.

So when he arrived, I helped out to change the tyres also and my cousin was like, "Wah, next time you can help change la." I was like, "I know, but I'm not sure about it. I learn through observing my dad do."

Even though I had to dirty my hands, I feel satisfied. I dunno why, guess I like to do this kinda stuff. Doing things and get dirty in the process. Maybe that's why I kinda like art. Haha!!

Two years passed since Daddy went back, but I still can't really get used to not having him around. Gosh, I'm being emotional. Anyway, I'm also grateful that I have the chance to follow him around and learn a few things from him.

Like changing tyres, knowing most of the roads in Kuching - though I don't really remember the road names but I kinda know how to get to certain places. I told this to Christine and I was shocked to know that she don't even know how to pump petrol, what more to say change a tyre! And to think she went to the drinving workshop and all!! So I am so grateful to Daddy for showing me how to do all this. If he were still around, I bet I'm already driving now but he's not.

I miss him. I miss going to places we used to go last time together. Though we always disagree with each other, I learned a lot of things from him. He's a hole in me that can never be filled but that doesn't mean that I'm not moving forward. I am. But it's not wrong to miss him. He's a part of me and it will never go away.

HOT, HOWT, HAWT!!!

It's so HOT, HOWT, HAWT nowadays in Kuching. And to make things worse, there's haze. I went out of the house this morning and instantly, my nose picked up the smoky smell in the air. A.k.a. the haze. Gosh!

So I think I'll be super cranky when someone smokes in front of me. Hello, it's already hazy enough and you want to smoke some more!!! Grrr...

Something like this happened last year too, right? I think so. This is like a yearly event for us Sarawakians. How pitiful. The hot weather ain't helping either.

I want to pray for rain to cool the place down but the problem is, when it starts to rain cats and dogs and cows, whatever, we -me especially - will start complaining. Because when it rains, it'll get wet. And I hate it. But no choice ba. It's either rain or shine here in Malaysia.

I wish there's a way to have a cool weather WITHOUT getting wet and stuff....

I wish we have winter.......

I wish the haze would just go away.....

I wish the weather will just COOL DOWN!!!!!!

i'm not here~~

I'm not supposed to be blogging right now...

I'm not supposed to be online right now too...

Because I have exam at 2pm later...

And I only started studying like, last night!!

Because I was so busy last week, I didn't have time to study....

And when I have the time, I threw it away because I kind of forgot how to study for this kind of subject....

I really REALLY hate exams with essays with a lot of marks!!

I'm more of a practical person.

But even though it's only about 3 hours left for my exam, I don't feel scared.

Not yet maybe...

I don't want to fail.

And yet, I can't bring myself to study...

How then???

I'm not supposed to be here...

Yet I am...

Miang! Gatal! Ham sap! Kenja! Pervert!

I never knew that the day would come where I would encounter kenja (perverted) policeman. Ok fine, I met some before (thanks to my involvement in the Majlis Raja-Raja) but never like this!!

I was on the way home with Mary and it was already 1a.m. We were both tired and can't wait togo home. We were both joking and talking to lighten up the mood. We were at the Bulatan Simpang Tiga when we saw a police patrol car. Apa gik, Mary wave at them. Then she told me how she wish they could escort her back home because she have to drive to Tabual Laru alone after sending me back.

I freaked out when she waved at them but oh well, what's done is done. Then, as we were almost near my house, Mary freaked out because the same police patrol car pulled over in front of us!!! Then mula la they come and try to ngurat us. Ask for number and so on. I was so annoyed because my house is just in front of and I'm being held back by two perverted policemen asking for our number!!

Of course, I gave a false name and my dad's old num. I checked the number and he did message me!! Kenja!! Rawr!!!

I don't like them polices anymore!!! Grrr!!!